How many parents will identify they have some variant of a “swear jar” at home?
It’s been recognised by many households to be a way to raise awareness of some bad habits that their children have and a way to modify those bad habits by putting a price on it which makes the child take responsibility for it.
It’s never fun to pay money for something that will show no personal return, that one doesn’t budget for or that is not believed to be a valid investment.
This gave me the idea that this concept should be introduced to parents who are separating in a conflicted manner.
What if every separating family were to have a “conflict jar” managed by their children?
What if for every conflict, every bad mouthing, every show of not taking responsibility, every blackmail, every holding of child support or child visitation, parents would have to pay an amount to the “conflict jar”?
If, as a Parent, you introduce this jar to your children’s upbringing because you want them to be the best person they can be, growing up, wouldn’t be acceptable for your children to introduce such a jar for their parents to be the best parents they can be for their children’s upbringing and childhood memories?
Taking responsibility to remain conflict free for the children’s sake is one of the most trying thing parents face, yet it is the most important thing parents need to have control over if they are truly concerned about what their separation is doing to the children.
Put yourself in your children’s shoes. How do you think they feel when they cannot make their parents change their bad habits?
What would your “conflict jar” look like?